This morning during worship I heard God whisper something into my spirit. He said I want you to share your testimony with your uncle, I didn't save you for you to now be quiet. My uncle has been going through some difficult situations lately and he needed to know that God is real and that He is more than able to turn around all circumstances no matter how bad they may seem. When we share our testimony with others it glorifies God. Yes there is a risk that that person will view you differently but more importantly it displays the love, compassion and redemptive power of God. So as I heard this whisper in my spirit, I just answered, okay God then give me the opportunity.
My testimony isn't pretty, it isn't easy, it isn't comfortable for others to hear but it's my love story of how my savior saved me from a pit of darkness and filth. For someone who knows the Michelle that I am now they could never imagine that my testimony actually happened, that I was once that girl. They just can't ever seem to fathom it. But that gives even more glory to the mighty power of my God. It shows that no matter how bad you think you've messed up God can turn it all around.
After service we were in the car and I was praying in my heart, "God give me an opportunity to say my testimony and take control of my words." And so I started....
Uncle, there's some things that I've gone through in my life that you have no idea about. My senior year of high school I had a lot of anger and rebellion in my heart and I got involved in drugs and alcohol. Then in December of my senior year of high school I got pregnant and had an abortion. And to cope with the pain and the shame I felt for what I had done I started doing cocaine to numb the pain, to numb my emotions and to forget about what I had done. I was addicted to cocaine for 6 months of my life. I hated my life. I would get drunk and just cry because I felt so much guilt for killing my child. I was in a deep depression. But God stepped into my world and he healed my hurts, he changed my heart, he gave me renewed hope and he restored me completely from the inside out. The Michelle that was in that pit of despair was set free. I am not that girl anymore, yes I made a mistake but God showed me that I didn't have to stay there. He saved me and showed me that my life could be made new. And now I'm able to talk to others who are in that deep pit and show them that God can save them, that He can turn their situation around. Your mistakes don't define you. You past doesn't have to be your future. God can change you, He can change the circumstances, He can save you.
For me saying all of this wasn't an easy task. To my uncle I am his pride and joy, he has always placed me on a pedestal, he has always thought highly of me. So telling this news to him was devastating but at the same time it needed to be done. In that moment God became very real to Him. It showed him that God isn't just someone that we read about in a bible like a story of someone who once was, no, it showed him that God is real and able to save people and turn their lives around even now.
Revelation 12:11 They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.
There will be opportunities in life where you sharing your testimony might cost you something, it might cost you your reputation, it might make others think differently of you but the risk is always worth it because where the spirit of the Lord is there is freedom. People don't need you to look perfect, to act perfect, to talk perfect, no, they need you to be real, they need you to step into the darkness where they are and say you know what I've been here before and this is the way that I made it out. They need you to be willing to be vulnerable and meet them where they are. They need to see that our God isn't a God who hates them and thinks their dirty rotten sinners but that He is a God who will step into their pit and lift them out.
He didn't save me and He didn't save you for you to be quiet. Who in your world is hurting and needs to hear your love story of how God saved you?
I pray that God would give you the opportunity to speak your testimony to someone who needs to hear it today.
Rooting for you always,
Michelle
